How DID Michelle Bachmann Ever Get Elected, Anyway?




With the recent gain by Republicans in the House of Representatives, Michelle Bachmann of Minnesota is looking for a leadership role (story:  "Michele Bachmann’s Leadership Bid Gets Cool Reaction",     Current Republican leaders are hesitant, and rightfully so.

Representative Bachmann has a long, long history of making irrational comments and accusations.  In the past, she has stated that every Democratic member of the United States Congress (House and Senate) should be investigated for "un-American" activities and behavior.  She has been one of the leading supporters of the Tea Party (in all its forms) in Congress, and started its Tea Party Caucus.  Lately, she has stated that "34 warships" are being sent to India during President Obama’s upcoming visit, and that it would cost "$200 million a day".  She has been receptive to, if not a proponent of, the most extreme right-wing opinions and beliefs held in the country.

She’s obviously batshit crazy, as anyone can see after doing a little research.

This raises two rather relevant questions:  (1) how the fuck did she ever get elected in the first place, and (2) why the fuck do they keep re-electing her?

After much cogitation over cigars and felines, I’ve come to a scenario which I believe fits the known facts. . .

I’d suspect Minnesota’s boring a lot of the time, although they’re not Iowa or Kansas. I’m sure that a few years ago, there was a backroom, smoke-filled bull session to see how they could get Minnesota noticed on the national scene.

"Let’s start a honorary state navy." "No, I doubt we could maintain it. Too costly."

"Incorporate citizen militias into the State National Guard?"  "No, we’d go broke from the lawsuits and trials after they started killing civilians and cops."

"Well, what if we bring back hanging for capital crimes?" "It’d be nice to rake in concessions from the rubes, but the crowds could get out of control."

And then, a small voice from the back made its presence known. . .

"Well. . .what if we elect a crack whore to the US House of Representatives?"

"Hey, waitaminnit. . .that just might be crazy enough to work!"

"And to make it even better, we’ll make it a woman who’s a holier-than-thou theocrat. That way, the people of the United States will ALWAYS remember Minnesota."

"Yeah, let’s try it!  We could always do worse. . .maybe elect a B-rated comedian from a TV show as Senator, after all. . ."

"Man, I’d love to see the looks on people’s faces when they get a load outta her. . ."

. . .and so, dear child, a legend was born. .  .

~ by okami on 2010/11/05.

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